Friday, November 16, 2012

Inconsistencies and Flas

I am self aware.

I know i'm not organized, I tend to bottle up emotions, and I tell bad (and long) stories. But what I lack in organization, talking about my feelings, and my monotonous story-telling I make up with intuition; I can read minds. I read people like books, can read their feelings, and point out their shortcomings (and strengths if you're an eternal optimist). I can tell you exactly what you're thinking when you look at me, giving away your mood with those non-verbal tendencies. Most of the time you make it easy for me. When I tell people that I know what they're thinking, reading their mind, etc. they usually are thinking i'm full of crap. Either that or "who is this stranger talking to me again?". People wear emotions on their sleeves and act crazy because they want to be noticed. They want someone to understand what's going on with them sooooo bad that they'll do anything to reach someone. It's why promiscuous women were invented and and posers were created to make fun of.

I know this person who contradicts everything she says. For example, maybe she says that her favorite football team is the Bears. I might disagree with her citing that, in fact, the Packers are better. 30 seconds later she is explaining to me that the Packers are in fact her favorite team because of _________________. I used to get mad at these little exchanges, but now I just make a game out of it. If you are a fan of betting on sports than you are familiar with an over/under which:


 is a wager in which a sportsbook will predict a number for a statistic in a given game (usually the combined score of the two teams), and bettors wager that the actual number in the game will be either higher or lower than that number. For example, in Super Bowl XXXIX, most Las Vegas casinos set the over-under for the score of the game at 46.0. A bettor could wager that the combined score of the two teams would be either more than or less than that number. Since the combined score of that game was 45, anyone who had bet on "under" won.


Thanks Wikipedia.

So basically I set an over/under on how many times I can get her to go back and fourth on a certain subject, in a certain day. Sometimes it starts in the morning, then I set a higher bar. Sometimes if in the evening, I really have to challenge myself. My hope is that one day I get her to switch opinions so much that eventually her brain overheats, starts to smoke, and then craps out like when I put that fork in the toaster oven. Burned.

I'm not really a mean person, I just can't stand when people aren't true to themselves.
Know yourself, love yourself, and accept the flaws that make you, you. No one is perfect, so don't try to be. Try too hard and I will use you like a week 13 Dolphins/Patriots game and take the over, because believe it or not, i'm VERY confident in my abilities.


Monday, November 5, 2012

The Resurrection!

And on the 1000th day, he rose again. Back from beyond the grave, come my writings, stories, and controversial conversations i'll be having with myself. Yes, it's been exactly 1000 days since I've written anything online, so I welcome the world back in to my life, even if they don't want to be!

I'll start and finish by explaining why I decided to start writ..blogging again. It's simple: I have a hard time expressing my true feelings, ideas, celebrations, and frustrations by word of mouth. You can ask Tara (have I not introduced you to Tara yet?) about the countless days I come hope either in a giddy mood or an irritable mood and can't explain why or how i'm feeling in that moment! Well, needless to say, she can really express her feelings with me in that moment...especially if i'm in the irritable mood...
Ok, so who is Tara? Most that are closely reading this blog know that I have a girlfriend; that is Tara. We live together in a tiny apartment in Chicago's hipster village called Wicker Park. I could write for hours and hours on why I love her so much, and she would just love that, but i'm going to sum it up fairly quickly. She is the female version of me, she knows just what to do to make me happy at any moment, and she is the funnest person on this planet to be around. I've never met someone that loves to laugh and smile more than her. ARE YOU HAPPY YET?

I'll be honest, I hate sharing my feelings, I've never really been good at it. If you ask my mother, she would tell you that my favorite phrase (and hers too!!) in HS was "I dunno". I still "dunno" about stuff half the time! But I don't mind writing about things that happen (especially if they're funny). If you want to react, feel free to write in the comments section and i'll do my best to avoid answering you.

Ben aren't you like a counselor or something?

Yes I am, I should be able to share feelings, thoughts, and everything but I don't ok?! SO LAY OFF ME! 


*first real blog to come later this week*