I’ve been living in Ecuador for about five months now and I’ve recently just started to consider this place home. Over the holidays I did a lot of thinking and I came to the conclusion that in order truly get a life experience, I would have to change my mind set. To be honest I was thinking of Cuenca as an exotic “holding pattern” before I start my “real life”. I thought it would be a good way to pass the year; learning Spanish, getting teaching experience, and doing it without snow. I came in to this venture with that (wrong) mindset and may have suffered for it. Now, I’m not saying I haven’t experienced some life changing events (as you will read about in my next blog) but I’ve been thinking of myself on a mini-vacation, doing some teaching on the side. This past weekend I went out dancing with some new Ecuadorian friends I’ve recently made. Conversing in Spanish over some drinks, it finally hit me that this is my home for the time being.
Having moved numerous times growing up (some for very short periods of time) I should have accepted this place sooner, as my home. I contribute my hesitations to job applications and future plans. I’ve always been the kind of person that lives in the moment, doesn’t need to plan, and worries about what I’m going to do for fun on the weekend. I’m disappointed in my maturation into adulthood because I’ve always prided myself on being the unique individual that doesn’t need to plan. Now, that sounds a little immature, BUT this experience is a perfect example of how I may have missed out on unique opportunities. Instead of applying for jobs I’ll probably never get, I could have been taking more Spanish classes. I could have been having a beer for lunch instead of mulling over needing sobriety to write essays for job applications.
To combat this return to planning for the future (don’t worry loved ones, I won’t totally negate the process) I have signed up for 6 hours of Spanish classes a week, I’ve started going to the gym more frequently, and I’m going to attempt to live by the notion, “just say yes”. Enough living in the future, for all I know, I could walk across the street and get hit by a bus tomorrow. Then I would die saying “I kind of knew Spanish”, or “I didn’t date an Ecuadorian girl because there was no future in it”. That’s not me.
A return to the old Ben will revive my experience and combat my recent feelings of home-sickness. This reunion, however, will not counteract my growth and newly acquired strengths of living abroad.
“What are those?” you ask. Read my next blog and find out……BOOM! (that’s me dropping a bomb of anticipation on you)
My friends and I call that the Philosophy of "Do". When there's an opportunity to do something, anything, the answer is always yes. Even though it might be more tempting to stay in and be lazy, once you're out the door and starting the activity, you're going to be glad you did. Woo for "Do"! :)
ReplyDelete